The Art of the Journal

 

For about 27 years or more, I have been keeping a personal journal.  Journaling is a practice that requires consistency and discipline, and thus it took a few false starts to really establish my own routine.  In recent years journaling has become more of a thing, and it's actually a good trend.  I wanted to just share my own experiences at journaling and use it to offer tips to others who may feel a desire to keep a journal, but no gumption to start one.  And, this is the first piece of advice I will give as we kick off the conversation - don't think about it, but just start!  That is what I essentially did, and it was the best thing I ever embarked upon as a personal project.  That being said, let's see where this conversation goes. 

There are many reasons and also many methods to journaling.  Journals can be permanent as a record of one's daily thoughts, or they can be specific - for instance, taking a course, undergoing a medical procedure, going through a life change, etc.   Some people feel the need to keep a specific journal for a specific reason - that is perfectly fine, as there is no rubric to when to keep a journal nor for how long.  The journal serves a primary purpose of challenging feelings and thoughts in a way one may not be otherwise able to communicate them, and it also is an opportunity to share feelings in a way you cannot with another person.  The journal is between you, it, and God, and only you can decide whether to share it or not.  This means then that anyone can keep a journal.  And, that leads to another observation.

You do not have to be a professional writer or anything else to keep a journal - write as you like, and don't worry about proper grammar, etc.  It does help if you know proper grammar, but it isn't necessary. Also, the more you write, the better you will write anyway.  Your journal will not be graded on grammatical perfection, and it also will not be scrutinized by a bunch of pompous-assed critics who fancy themselves literary experts (we all know about self-proclaimed "experts," and in all honesty, you can crap in one hand and place an "expert" opinion in the other, and then weigh them to see which has more substance).  Your journal is your thoughts, and you have the prerogative to express them in a way that reflects who you are.  Getting over that hurdle is something that will be a motivating factor in keeping a regular journal.  And, that leads to another issue worth examination - privacy.

A journal ideally is private - it is for the writer's eyes only, and the writer of the journal has the freedom to choose how much they want to disclose.  Even in a court of law, a personal journal should never be considered admissable evidence, as it is a violation of privacy and thus sacrosanct.  A person may actually be a raving psycho in their journal, but it is still just that - their journal. Further, if you are married, this is an area you also do have some freedom to not share with your spouse - if you feel comfortable doing so, then that is fine, but it should not be a condition of marriage for a spouse to have access to their husband's or wife's personal thoughts.  If a spouse tries to guilt you into letting you read your personal journal, it probably means that your spouse has serious insecurities and trust issues.  Therefore, at the start of a marriage, you can establish boundaries.  And, besides, if you pass away before they do, then they can read all they want because it will not matter then.  This may seem a bit controversial, but I think it is also a reasonable standard as well. 

So, this leads to methodology.  A journal is not something that is concrete as far as form goes - it can be as dry as just documenting daily activities, or it can be a practical novella.   That depends on the personality and writing style of the person keeping the journal.  Journals are also not restricted to just written words either - there are sketch journals, photo journals, and even scrapbook journals that contain bits and pieces of different things that inspire the person.   Content is also open as well - a journal can record daily events, it can also be a tool to use in daily religious devotion, it can be a way to vent things that may be weighing on one's mind, it can be a record of your dreams you have as you sleep, or it can be a combination of all the above.  That again is the prerogative of the person composing the journal.  In the case of mine, I am one who includes all the above, as together for me they present a more comprehensive picture.  Be as creative as you want with your journal, in other words. 

Another misconception is that a personal journal is just one book - anyone who would see mine would instantly radically change their view.  While there are instances of one-volume journals for particular circumstances, a journal kept daily will accumulate multiple volumes.  In my case, I have been writing in mine for over 27 years, and all of the books I have of my journal fill up a whole shelf in a cabinet right now, and there will be more I am sure.  The more and longer you write, the more of a personal library of your thoughts you are going to build.  I will get into shortly how that works, and what the best type of book to record your journal really is.  

As for designating time to keep a journal, in my experience that also varies.  While it is a good discipline to set aside a regular time each day to write down thoughts in your journal, it may not always be convenient.  Over the years, I have written entries in my journals in bizarre places such as office bathrooms, break rooms, restaurant booths, parking lots, parks, bus stops, and at my desk in offices I have worked on slow work days.  Writing in a journal is a good way to pass time when you are waiting on a bus or a ride, or if you have to be at the office some time before your work shift starts.  You can use it to clear your head and focus yourself for the day ahead in that case.  Ideally, I like writing journal entries before I go to sleep at night, as generally I am by myself and it is quiet and I don't risk being disturbed.  A big pet-peeve I have is when you happen to be writing at a bus stop or something and some stranger who doesn't know you from the man in the moon comes up and has to ask "Whatcha doin'?" and it will provoke a rude response like telling such a person what they can go do to themselves and to mind their own frigging business.  If you see a stranger reading a book, or writing something, just mind your own damn business and leave them alone - they don't want you sticking your nose where it doesn't belong.  If they wanted to share that with you, they would - but, they don't know who you are, nor do they care, so what they do is not your business.  This is something called common courtesy.  I just wanted to share that as it is a major area of contention at times. 

A journal may also inspire one to pursue other things.  My journal, for instance, inspired me to blog, and it also gave me inspiration to write down my whole life story in a way that is comprehensive.  That latter aspect is something I owe a debt of gratitude to my late mother for.  Back when I was just beginning my journal in 1996, one day Mom was visiting our house and she got to talking about a dog we used to have named Jill.  Reliving some of those memories caused a bit of inspiration for me that night as I was doing my daily journal entry - I could use my journal as a way to tell my own story!  For the next year and a half or so, I wrote different aspects of my life story as part of my daily journal entry, and some time later I decided to collect those into a separate book and then add details as I recalled them or they were given to me on areas I may not have been old enough to remember.  After my 60th birthday in a few years, I plan on typing that whole story out and getting it bound into a book.  It is a legacy I can leave behind, and thus integral to keeping our family history fresh too. 

My journal has also aided in doing blogging like this - even this conversation on journaling is the result of a journal entry!  The journal helps me often to get some thoughts organized so I can present a good story for my blogs, and thus it plays an integral role.  It also has helped over the years with class projects and other things too.  While not divulging the entire aspect of the journal, you can glean the idea and apply it.  

One further aspect of journaling that is important has to do with dreams.  Everyone has dreams at night while we sleep, and on occasion those dreams stick out to us.  A dream can be explained by a number of things.  For one, it is a type of positive coping mechanism especially during times of stress.  Secondly, it is more or less a sort of convergence of a lot of thoughts, memories, etc., that one has floating around in their head - the dream mechanism gives those disparate thoughts expression.  Third, if you are a religious person like I am, some dreams have meanings - pay attention in particular to details that stick out in a dream, as they could have some significance.  Fourth, a dream can also be a reaction to too many onions in your fish cakes or spicy pepperoni on your pizza, and thus they can range from the bizarre to the frightening.  Whatever the case, if you wake up with that dream fresh on your mind, write it down!  If you cannot do a journal right away, then at least keep a small notebook handy to write your dream and its details down so you can then add it to your journal later.   Some people keep a journal exclusively for dreams too, and that is largely their choice on that.  Dreams can tell one a lot about themselves though, so it is important to document them.  And if a particular detail sticks out, then look it up to see if there may be some symbolism behind it.  I had a dream like that myself recently entailing my traveling to different Pacific islands.  In the dream, one particular word, "buhay," stuck out.  When I inquired about the meaning of that word, I found out it was a Tagalog word meaning "life."  Knowing that detail put that entire dream into perspective.  Writing these things down will prove valuable later. 

Finally, the question arises as to what type of book do you keep a journal in?  Again, there is not a set criteria for this, but I stick generally with professionally-made journal books as they just look better.  However, in the past I have used spiral notebooks, composition books, and other things as journals, but for the most part they are not really designed for the type of interaction you will want to have, so a neatly bound book specifically for journaling is your best bet.  On Amazon oftentimes, you can buy these in bulk quantities of ten, which is what I do.  That way, you don't have an interrupted journal routine.  Always keep a dependable ink pen with your journal book too - some ready-made books have a place for pens in them.   Then, keep the journal book in a secure place so that nosy people in the house do not mess with it.   You can also add things to the journal as well - items such as sticker art, bookmarks, photos, prayer cards, and even some newspaper and magazine clippings can be inserted between the pages.  I do this a lot with mine.  Your journal is a blank canvas, and thus you have the opportunity to design it as you see fit. 

Thank you for allowing me to share these practical tips about journaling, and I encourage you to maybe consider taking journaling up as a routine, as it will be a valuable resource later.  Any rate, so long until next visit. 

The Thrower Music Collection Update - Year 41

 In all honesty, I had not planned on updating this year because it has been a slow year for my collection.  With a lack of funds, as well as not really having a lot of items I am seeking after now, there was minimal activity.  But, I want to still report on what I did get, as it is significant.  

To begin, here are the numbers.  As of today, the total number of my items in my library is 3187, which breaks down to 1840 CDs, 1142 LP records, and 207 DVDs.   That means we are about 15 items from 3200 in the collection total.  The net gains for this year include 1 LP record, 1 2-disc CD set, and three DVD movies, which is a grand total of 6 new items.  Now, we can go into detail as to what those are. 

The LP record is of significance, as it is one of the last albums Harry James recorded before he passed away.  The LP is titled Ciribiribin after his theme song and was released in 1983.  I originally had this on a cassette tape when I was a teenager, and the major reason I got it was because of one song, Harry's stellar rendition of the 1970s pop song "Can't Take My Eyes Off of You."   This recording is very hard to find reissued on CD, and as far as I am aware, I don't think it has been.  Therefore, getting it on LP assures it a place in the collection.  The CD set is of the 1920s saxophone legend Loren McMurray, who was featured on several early records of bands such as those of Sam Lanin and Ben Selvin, but he also had a group of his own.  Unfortunately, he was one of the earliest casualties of the era, as he passed away very young in 1922, just over 100 years ago.  McMurray, therefore, is one of the rare and unsung talents of the era, and thanks to Archeophone Records, his legacy has been given some attention and thus is preserved. As to movies, my good friends at Zeus DVDs have a treasure trove of vintage big band films, and one of those I obtained was A Song is Born, which was released originally in theatres in 1948 and featured the talents of Benny Goodman, Louis Armstrong, Lionel Hampton, Charlie Barnet, and Benny Carter.  A similar lineup could be found in a 1944 film I also got called Jam Session, and the third movie I was able to get was from 1943, Around the World, which was one of the many pictures Kay Kyser's orchestra was featured in.  With those added to my collection now, it pretty much gives us everything we wanted as far as vintage big band movies go, and those movies in my collection begin with 1929's The Vagabond Lover, featuring Rudy Vallee, and end with 1994's Swing Kids, which entailed the persecution that young big band and jazz fans faced in Nazi Germany during the 1940s.  Thanks to modern technology, I now have a library of all these vintage films, and that is amazing in itself.  Those six items are essentially what I have gotten this past year, and although few, they are still significant and are integral to preserving this great music. 

I was also able to get my second CD shelf assembled last December, and also able to integrate all of the new CDs I had gotten over the past 6 years into the main collection.  I have a small collection of classic jazz recordings I have been getting since I was younger, and I decided to integrate those into the collection as well, which also swelled the numbers a bit from where they were.  In this context, "classic jazz" refers essentially to any post-Swing Era small-group jazz acts - the bebop legends such as Charlie Parker and Theolonius Monk, late 1950s and early 1960s jazz groups such as those of Dave Brubeck, Vince Guaraldi, and Ray Bryant, and later fusion jazz such as Freddy Hubbard as well as classic original jazz from later years such as Wynton Marsalis.  Integrating those into my main music collection essentially broadens the scope of my interests a bit, in that now it is still predominantly big band recordings but also there is a substantial amount of early popular music vocalists and vocal groups, post-WWII modern jazz, and some instrumental items (early Ray Conniff, Henry Mancini, etc.) that I actually like.  However, unlike my early collection efforts in my teens, I am not being indiscriminate in my collection, but rather am focusing on some things I like and am incorporating those into the collection as a whole.  It shows a level of evolution in my efforts too, as in the early days of just buying quarter LPs at the Rio Mall, when I got practically any artist that Henry Boggen played on WBT on his Sunday night show I listened to then, to for many years just focusing on vintage big bands and trying to limit what else I got, to finally accepting that some of the other stuff was actually good and I had favorites that I liked (for instance, I still appreciate Pat Boone's "Love Letters in the Sand," as well as non-big band instrumentals like Ray Conniff's "S'wonderful" and Henry Mancini's "Theme from Mr. Lucky.").  So, I am at that point of just incorporating those into the collection and broadening my musical interests while at the same time remaining true to my vintage big band core collection.  And, after 41 years of my love of this music, I have a collection I like and can be proud of.  This is where we are as we embark on Year 42.  

I am also considering now taking my collection and turning it into something more constructive, and I feel like my soon-to-be-earned Ph.D. will be a vehicle for doing that.  Although my dissertation I am working on is something completely different from music, I have been toying with the idea of actually doing my own book later on vintage big bands, and it would be a different sort of book than the earlier histories of legendary writers and commentators such as George T. Simon and Leo Walker.  Rather, I am thinking more on the lines of what the big band genre actually is (and if it is even fair to call it "big band," as it also entailed a lot of smaller groups), as well as when and where this musical tradition evolved from.  My theories, as I have been listening to this stuff for a good 43 years now, are going to probably be something totally different from what many music historians have said.  For one, I don't tie big bands exclusively to the evolution of jazz - while they are somewhat entwined, the big band tradition I believe predates jazz by decades, in that I see its roots in the parlor orchestras - such as those of Edward Issler - of the 1880s, as well as the minstrel show music of individuals such as Will Marion Cook from around the same period of time.  The collection I have now actually reflects that, and what I want to do is create a new and unique history of this great music that would entail my theories on this.  I can see it now though - there will be jazz purists, as well as even other big band enthusiasts, who will more than likely give me guff about what I will say, but that is OK.  After all, I am not the first to stir up controversy in that area, as the late jazz historian Richard Sudhalter sort of did the same thing in his book Lost Chords when he correctly noted that jazz was not exclusively an African-American art form, but rather an American art form that reflected the melting-pot influence of its earliest performers.  I plan on also incorporating Sudhalter's view into my own thesis, and basically taking it and expanding it but not focusing as much on jazz, as the music genre called big band actually encompasses even more complexity in its origins.  I aim to do essentially the first academic study of the big band movement as a whole. and in doing so, it will be my ultimate expression of my own passion for collecting this wonderful music. And, a project like that would be the ultimate legacy of my own interest in the music itself. 

As for this coming year, I am not sure where we are going. I don't have a set goal as to how many CDs or anything else I will acquire, but I do have my eyes on a couple of things.  For one, there has recently been a reissued collection of several volumes on the Classics label of Hal Kemp's whole catalogue, and at this time there are seven volumes.  That will be an objective this year.  The other item I have on the scope that is of interest is a classic LP that was released in 1958 that was very innovative.  It features two orchestras - Les Brown's Band of Renown and the orchestra of Vic Schoen (who was better known for being the conductor of the band that backed the Andrews Sisters and others in the 1930s and 1940s) - who combine their talents to create a serious work for two bands playing together.  I have heard some of this actually, and it is phenomenal.  The album has never been reissued on CD, so I will settle for the LP original for now.  There may be some other things that come up between now and next year at this time, so we will play that by ear.  But, the goal has been set, and we will get the Hal Kemp collection as well as the Les Brown/Vic Schoen LP classic.  If we are successful at obtaining those, it will boost my collection to 3195, just short of 3200.  That is OK though, as I am at a point in my collection where numbers are no longer a factor, but rather focusing on those items we really want to get.  

Thank you for allowing me to share my journey of 41 years of a phenomenal music collection, and I look forward to sharing Year 42.