Year-End Perspectives

 Today as I write this - December 20 - we are approaching the end of 2022.  There is a lot about this year to talk about, and therefore this is my year-end post.   First, I wish everyone here a joyous holiday season, whether you observe Christmas, Hannukah, or you are just waiting to ring in 2023.  I do not count Kwanzaa in that, because it is a fake holiday - no offense to people of color, but most Blacks I know already celebrate Christmas anyway, and a few are even Jewish, so Kwanzaa makes no sense to me.  That is my politically incorrect observation to really spark interest in what I say.  For those who may take issue with that, lighten up - people are allowed to have different opinions, so I advise the detractors of my statement to grow a pair.  Thank you, and that is a fun way to kick off the conversation!

This, in all honesty, has been perhaps one of the weirdest years I have had in a long time.  It wasn't totally bad, but a lot of things have happened over the course of the year that have cast an air of uncertainty over it.  The biggest factor was the loss of my mother back in March, when she succumbed to a lingering medical issue she was fighting since December of last year.  Given Mom had no actual estate, and her status as a veteran, taking care of her arrangements was not a big challenge.  She was interred in a beautiful veteran's cemetery just outside of Cumberland, MD, called Rocky Gap, and the gravesite is actually very beautiful too, with a panoramic mountain view overlooking the site.  Burying Mom was not the biggest challenge, and it never is - the real burden was in missing her after she was gone.  I imagine that anyone who has experienced the loss of a parent could relate to this - you have them with you all your life, and then they are gone.  And, as the reality of that sets in (as it did for me in May) it can be overwhelming.  Mom's loss means that both parents are now gone onto their eternal reward, and that is an equally weird feeling too.  

Also, my doctoral studies at Liberty University, which thankfully I can do fully online from home, are in a good place.  I was accepted into an honor society, the Omega Nu Lamda Online Honor Society, earlier this year, and I also was able to be rewarded my Executive Certificate in History, which is a post-graduate credential that is achieved once one meets the mid-point of the doctoral program.  My courseload this year has been a little different, as the majority of the Spring and Summer terms were seminar courses that help prepare one for the dissertation phase of the program, and at the end of the Fall semester I have completed about 50% of the Comp Reading phase - I will finish that up in the Spring with two courses on Early Modern and Modern Europe.  Then after taking what is essentially a dissertation intro course called Doctoral Historical Research in the Summer term, I officially start the last year of the program in the dissertation phase, which will (if all goes well) be a nine-month stretch.  Once that is done and the dissertation is written, I will be scheduled for a defense of it and upon successful completion of that I will then officially be a Ph.D.  I really have wanted my doctorate since my undergrad years, and it is so good to be so far along with it now and seeing the end is in sight.  In all honesty, I wish I would have had this done 20 years ago, but the circumstances of life did not allow it then.  But I am able to do it now.  I have faced much opposition over the years from even family members, but I have some advice for people who have encountered this type of opposition - most of the real detractors really have opinions that mean little or nothing.  They are not encouraging you; they are not investing anything into your endeavors, they do not know your heart or spirit, and they just don't matter. Even if it is family, I offer some very practical advice - when they come against you, just tell them to go screw themselves.  They do not have a right to say anything to you, and you don't have an obligation to listen to them - they are useless, and they will only drag you down and distract you if you give them any leeway.  Just continue to do what you do, and in my case, I have done well, and if any of my "critics" have anything to say, I say to them - "Merry Christmas, and screw you!"  A little coarse I know, but they deserve it. Toxic relatives are one of the greatest causes of disappointment in people's lives, and to be honest, they forfeit the title of "family" when they come against you.  They are parasites, viruses, and their opinion is not worth what I scrape out of the cat's litterboxes when I clean them.  I used to have more resentment towards such people, but in all reality, that is not worth it either.  They really do not matter, and your focus should be on what you are driven to do, and they do not have any place in your life if they don't know how to be encouraging and supportive.  So, again, screw them.  

Besides losing my mom and continuing my doctoral work, this year has had a number of other challenges too, but we have come through them. That is the other lesson of the year too - trusting in God.  I have come to a place where I have no choice but to trust God, as at times things can be somewhat beyond our control.  The challenges make one stronger, and they are the building blocks of true character too.  It is also important to remember as well that if God brought you this far, then he is going to take care of everything else.  That is the big lesson of the year. 

Not all news was uncertain and challenging this year though, as there have been many good things happening too.  For one, although I lost my little bunny Trixie in July, I did get two of the most adorable bunnies to replace her, one a white female with gray spots we named Zoe and the other a black lionhead/Lop mix I named Buzzy.  A few weeks ago, they blessed us with four little babies, and they are about to get new homes soon - they are adorable, and if you are local and reading this, consider a bunny as a Christmas present for someone and please get in touch.  I also have another piece of news I will share at another time, as presently I am not able to do so, but it has been a very wonderful thing that has happened for me going back to July.  Maybe at the end of next year I will share more on that too. 

It has also been a good year for travel too, as during the summer I was able to go to Ocean City, and to Hershey, PA.  That was actually quite nice and fun, and it is good to get out a little and enjoy life.  And, although Barbara and I are now divorced, we still get along very well and are very close, and to be honest she has been a Godsend with many things this year, especially in dealing with Mom's passing.  I am very thankful she was around then.  One day, I will tell more of Barbara's and my story, but essentially it goes back 33 years, and we started off as close friends, and we are back there again.  At some point I will share more details, as it will be obvious that people will have questions.  Therefore, that is a preview for next year.  

As for my music collection and other things, after celebrating 40 years of collecting my vintage big band records, I am in a new place with that.  I am not anticipating a whole lot of new stuff this coming year, and don't have many plans to get a lot either save a couple of rarer finds I want to acquire. With an uncertainty regarding my income and such at this point, I am not planning a lot of groundbreaking purchases in the coming months.  This is a transitory period for me and I am not really sure of what direction things will take, so it is all a "wait and see" state right now.  I already have pretty much everything else I need though, so a lot of extensive purchases will really not be necessary.  God has been good despite challenges. 

At any rate, that is where we are at approaching the end of 2022.  I hope and pray that everyone reading this has a blessed and good New Year, and I will see you next time.