Walking on Eggshells

 One of the major challenges of being a teacher - especially at the high school level - is trying to maintain order.  The kids in my classes are at that age where they think they have it all figured out, and they often try to manifest it in their behavior.  This can be challenging to deal with when you have a class of about 15 juniors who choose often to be loud, disruptive, and deliberately try to cause issues.  The student who asks to go to the bathroom and then is out for most of the class.  The other student who has a penchant for being the class clown and finds ways to derail the day's class discussion. Yet others think that the fundamental rules of classroom decorum somehow don't apply to them and they try to manipulate things to their advantage.  For anyone who has taught high school, you know exactly what I am talking about.  Generally, you learn how to deal with these issues as time goes on, but then a sponsorship committee for the school you teach at shows up and they sit in on your class.  Then, the particular students who are the "problem children" are not at their best, and it doesn't look good.  That was my week so far.  In many ways, I also understand that perhaps I read too much into it, and in reality it may not be as bad as I think.  But, the craziness of the situation does cause you some discomfort - you lose sleep over it, and you start having concerns about what will happen if you lose your contract over something like that.  In most cases, that probably will not happen, as at times we tend to mentally put ourselves through stress over things that are in reality trivial matters.  Once this is realized, the overwhelming relief one feels is a feeling that is indescribable at times - it is as if a huge weight has been lifted, or that you fell off a cliff and someone with the skill of a cowboy lassos you and pulls you back before you plummet to your death. Have any of you reading this felt that before?

I teach at a Jesuit high school in Baltimore, and as part of their compliance measures they have annual visits from a variety of committees - ones dealing with Jesuit schools in general, diocesan teams, educational network people, etc.  It is natural to seek to maintain standards, and understandable that these visits are accountability measures.  But, they can also be stressful as the future of your position as well as even the future of the school could depend on what they report later.  I have dealt with review committees before - my most recent experience was my dissertation committee when I was finishing up my Ph.D. last year.  On one hand, it is a milestone, and as my Research Director for my dissertation told me, we should not view it as an inquisition but rather as an opportunity to celebrate your achievement. Maybe school committees who visit and observe should be viewed in the same way, something easy to say in theory but then a bit challenging in practice, especially when you have some students that do not want to cooperate.  

One thing I have learned about committees as well.  In many cases, when these individuals visit and observe, interview, and present findings, they are doing so as teachers themselves in many cases.  They have been where you are, they understand the challenges, and they may not be as hard on you as you are on yourself.  But, honestly, it is still unnerving.  The idea here is in this case to try to see the bigger picture, and come to the realization that your worst moments will not necessarily seal a grim fate for your career.  After all, everyone has bad days, right?  Again, this can be easier said than done, but at the same time it also should be viewed in the context of similar situations.  Also, talking to your colleagues can relieve some worries as well, as many of them are facing the same situation you are.  Maybe they can offer some advice.  One very nice thing about this school where I teach is that we have support structures in place - our subject-area department has regular meetings, as does our grade-level instructor groups.  These meetings are generally weekly or monthly, and it is a chance to voice concerns and relate to your fellow instructors regarding things that come up.  Many of them also deal with the same group of students you do, so they understand the issues you may be facing.  Therefore, groups like that can be a valuable resource. 

Onto less onerous topics, I wanted to express my satisfaction at President Trump's progress at attempting to clean up things.  He has a job ahead of him, and already the culprits who are responsible for the issues are screaming, but they are also losing.  America has been in serious need of reform for a long time - in society and in government.  Trump's new Department of Government Efficiency (DOGE) is headed by tycoon Elon Musk, and he has already rooted out a lot of waste in government spending as well as streamlining and correcting problems caused by that waste.  Why anyone in their right minds would oppose this escapes sound logic - regardless one's political persuasion, elevating the life of our citizens while holding bureaucrats accountable should be a rallying point for almost all of us.  Yet, it is not unfortunately, and there are some in this liberal bastion called Baltimore that are actually lamenting the rein-in of corruption.  What I have to say to them is this - if you like the old way so much, then go somewhere and build your little utopia where you can have the status quo, as corrupt as it is, continue. But, if you find your quality of life gets worse, remember you wanted this, so suck it up Buttercup.  And, that leads me to some other weekly observations I wanted to note.

One major thing in the news is Pope Francis and his health.  He was hospitalized last week with double pneumonia, and at almost 89 years old, this makes him highly vulnerable.  Now, last report is that he may be in the initial stages of kidney failure as well.  I wanted to reflect on this a moment.  First, I am no fan of Pope Francis - in all honesty, he has been one of the worst Pontiffs of the Church in centuries, and he has also inflicted much damage on good, orthodox clergy in order to advance his own agenda.  But, at the same time, no one wishes ill will to him healthwise - having a respiratory problem like that is no fun, believe me, so I empathize with Francis on that.  We should also definitely pray for the Pope - any person with a heart and soul, regardless of what they think of him otherwise, cannot deny the importance of this.  But, in praying for his health, let's also pray that this is a time of reflection for him, and that he can have a conversion of heart to rectify some bad decisions he has made.  Whether he survives this (and it is not looking good) or not is neither here nor there; the salvation of his soul is.  If he comes out of it, perhaps he can be a Pope with a changed heart.  If he doesn't, then maybe in his final moments he can find the grace he needs to end his life on a good note.  Ultimately, it's in God's hands, but let us continue to lift up Pope Francis in our prayers regardless. 

Thank you for allowing me to spill my proverbial guts again this week, and will see you again soon.